Raves and Rants

Canadians help me!

SO i am starting back on my super clean eats again, Canada has an amazing range of organic and health alternatives for the pantry, it makes me excited espically the ezkiel bread i have heard so much of

I need followers help, do you read an amazing health blog that happens to be Canadian more specifically from Vancouver?, Currently i work at a health food catering/delivry food service personal service that follows clean eating (which is a great rewarding job i found) i want boost the marketing and show others how great this is, i want to contact some bloggers who couuld tell ‘the world’ about this great program

If you can help let me know!

Promise to be back on soon

Erin

I’m Back!

Wow long time no speak, been wrapped up in my new life in Canada, things have taken a turn for the better espically my social life.. unfortunatley the gym has taken a back seat and the healthy eating - BUT i havent put any weight on and am back on the wagon… Canada has amazing organic health food available.. somethings however are not that grand.. not loving the meat (quality seems poor) and things are a tad more expensive

SO stay tuned to hear more from me.. even if i have lost some followers!

Erin

CANADA BOUND

HOLA

If anyone reads this i apologise as i have been SUPER FLAT OUT with the move and all other exciting stuff promise i will be back on here in a few more weeks

xxxx

Holy Crap…I am moving overseas in 3 weeks!

I’m sitting on the floor (house i am house-sitting has 5 grand couches that i am scared i am going to drop something on) eating defrosted spaghetti bolganase it didn’t hit the spot sure i will rampage through the cupboards later!

This weather has been so hot its either beach, pool or Aircon…

I opted for the aircon, i have worked myself into a sort of paranoia about how i look in a bikini , i dont think i appear over weight at first sight because of my height but my upper thighs, hips and especially my stomach makes me opt out for time in the sun and to get a nice tan it sucks, i wonder why i got over this worry in Europe?

I am feeling a tad worried, i pretty much know why, i smoked some ‘stuff’ on new years eve (i get sucked into the flow of it getting passed around at a small party/bbq) it always gets me down after the next couple of days - i should really remember this.. yes i use the excuse i have it maybe twice a year but even then i cant deal with this emotional vomit so to speak

I am freaking quite honestly about my move in 3 weeks, its crept up so soon, this week i have to resign from work and hopefully get my car sold so i actually have money to travel with, if these things both go smoothly i have been very fortunate with things working out to the lead up to my trip.. Fingers crossed!

i keep thinking of the worse things that could happen, i cant help it i am stressing out bad

i feel like i am not ready to leave, i don’t know why, i have a feeling of unfinished business weirdly enough and cant help but think of both sets of grandparents and if they will still ‘be here’ when i get back.. dumb i know

But that’s one reason i am leaving i need to separate from my family - yes i love them but they have to much hold over me, i need to grow up away from them, they are not helping with past matters that i need to get over

So in 3 weeks i hopefully develop some healthy social relationships that i am craving for at the moment.. its weird i like alone time, and i like friendship/company but i freak out when i am in both situations like i am suffocating. weird

So i said i wouldn’t but this post is a bit of a brain fart so to speak haha

xx

No real resoultions except be happy :)

Rant ahead - Warning

Rant ahead

I feel like an emotional and sensitive wreck at the moment.. yes its the time of the month but SHEESH.. its like something little happens and my tears flow out

I let a customer get to me tonight she was a biatch who knew how to get me pissed off, she didn’t let me talk and then continued to belittle me.. and when i got one word in which was frustrating most likely sounding, she would accuse me of having attitude. she made a complaint about me after i didn’t give her what i wanted and told me she didn’t like my tone excuse me? why cant i complain about a rude ass customer… my job takes its toll on you mentally its like you are a punching bag for customers who are basically shit and don’t like consequences and play the victim, you know what its pay TV its not the end of the world, go and be outside in the wonderful weather and grow up!

ARGGGHHH i shouldn’t even worry, i will never meet this person but i care too much about what others think in a weird self conscience way, i just want to be me, yes i have faults but guess what i am not perfect, no one is.

I am me….

- Yes i can come across negative at times - To me its being realistic, i cant be all positive fake.. to me its FAKE, i am real i have up and downs in my life and get happy when i see people get emotional or angry i am happy.. because i don’t feel alone, i am happy when i need to be i dont sugar coat shit, if i am good i will say i am good… you wont hear me say great unless i have won tattslotto because thats when i would i would be great!!.. get my point?

- I haven’t had a picture perfect life so to speak but my god i think i am amazing to still get through things and be there for others so cut me some friken slack

- Yes i open about who i am that doesn’t mean you can criticize me and bag me out, just because i can point out my bad habits doesn’t mean its inviting you to join in, its to make you realise.. Don’t hurt me i am a human being like you and i just want to be your friend, if you are a hurtfl backstabbing friend, there is no arguments just go away i don’t need toxic friendships.

I am my own worst enemy lately, i realised i have so many amazing people i know but i don’t class them as friends, friends are there for you when you need them the most, i don’t have those ‘friends’ and it hurts, i hate admitting it but i feel like i need to, i think i am worried that for as good company i am etc etc i am a loser.. yes i have admitted it finally

I have also been slack with my ‘healthy life’ been snacking on sugar and basically shit because i feel blah (not sad not angry just fed up) and i bought smokes tonight.. and the worst part they tasted like yuck!

I want to start again once i get overseas but i know its going to take awhile to get settled and i am scared things wont go ‘to plan’

I’m sorry i don’t mean to fill your dash with this crap but its my only release i would rather think someone gets it or reads it briefly because then it will feel like i am not entirely alone so to speak

Don’t worry in the new year i will deleting all these posts and creating a personal locked tumbler and a healthy one

:)

Erin

Arghh what shit weather today then again i live in Melbourne why am i shocked. The day started off sunny and hot 30 degrees and now there are thunder storms, rain and hail and huge winds Jesus christ! no seriously wtf!